Oh No! Does God Want Me to Date Her?

December 1972

Ray started dating Linda who had a friend who was a girl who sat in the back of the car with me as I hung out with Ray and his girlfriend. Periodically Ray and Linda used to look in the back seat with me and this girl sitting there by ourselves not talking to each other. From the front they terrified me by saying over and over, "You guys make a good lookin' couple." I was horrified.

I may sound pretty shallow, but Linda's friend was not pretty. I know that beauty is skin deep, but she was not pretty inside or outside. Wherever we went, this cloud hung over her. She could make your happy day a miserably depressing one. She had that effect. She oozed negativity.

So after hearing Ray and Linda several times telling us how great a couple we were, I began thinking God wanted me to date her.

We arrived at her house to drop her off and Ray quietly told me to walk her to her door... and as I walked I thought, "God wants me to go out with her and I have to kiss her."

Now there are probably worse things in life, but I can't think of anything worse off hand.

I got to her door and as she waited for my good bye kiss, I said to myself, "I don't care if God wants me to date her, I am not going to." I turned around to go back to the car, believing that I committed a sin, but as I walked back to the car, I felt profoundly good. It was as if God was saying, "You don't have to date her."

Several months later Brian (the guy who brought me to Christ, who was also the most godly and one of the smartest people I knew) came to me for the only advice he'd ever turn to me for. "God has given you a ministry with women," he said (I never really thought about it like that, but I did date a lot of girls). He continued, "My two married friends have been telling me how good it would be if I dated this particular girl. She's nice and all, but I'm just not interested. Do you think God wants me to marry her?" I knew the answer to that one right away and was glad to help Brian find relief.